Excuses Begone! How To Change Lifelong, Self- Defeating Thinking Habits by Dr. Wayne Dyer

Dr. Wayne Dyer challenges all of us in his book Excuses Begone when he called our attention to the many excuses we have used to justify why we are choosing to remain stuck in unhappy, unfulfilled and miserable situations. excuses like: it is too difficult, I cannot afford it, there will be family drama, I am not smart enough among others have been our scapegoats to run away from taking responsibility for our own lives and actually changing them for the better.

Remember all the things which you have been postponing until now? The dream you have had for like forever, but which only remained pigments of imagination at the back of your mind but was never materialized because of one excuse or another? How about that habit you just cannot shake off, which both you and I know is not doing you any good and needs to go right now? That can of soda you must have every day or a boss you cannot refuse? These and many others are excuses which according to Dr. Wayne, we have allowed to infiltrate our lives and make us helpless.

Where do excuses come from?

Dr. Wayne opens our eyes to an astonishing truth: that indeed everything that is wrong with us comes from those things and people who surround us in our environment. He testifies that in the life of every adult person, lies a series of ideas which they absorbed from hearing what others think and say about money, for example, there being not enough of it, or abut health, there being so many ways someone can get sick, or for example, in my case, about people, there being no genuine person left on this otherwise beautiful earth. it is these ideas which have become like mind viruses, encroaching on all our dreams and sense of self worth and determination to realize those dreams. He gave an example, where if someone grew up poor, he heard from his parents how money is hard to come by, and it is through this lens he grows up to see the world. This man, no matter how much his financial state improves later in life, he still lives with fear that at any time, he could lose it and be back in poverty again. In some instances, he could feel like he does not deserve to enjoy so much money or feel like he cannot afford the lifestyle he wants and dreams of.

So how does anyone break their habit of excuses?

Dr. Wayne says, with a little bit of passion for your dreams, and imagination, you can break any old habit of thinking which has been harming you until now. He also mentions that our false sense of self, or what we call ego, is the root cause of the many excuses we give ourselves, and if one were to awaken to their higher sense of self, the god within, then all excuses would vanish. Therefore, Dr. Wayne recommends letting go of our egos, and living a spiritually-attuned lifestyle, where we practice self awareness and consciousness so we can get ahead and leave our excuses behind. Most importantly, it is through believing in our divineness, that we are divine beings i.e. souls with a body and not a body with a soul, that we can transcend any limitations brought about by our upbringing, genes, subconscious programming or our environment. To sum up, it is by living a spiritual life where we are in harmony with god within and without, and are driven not by selfish egos, but by selfless compassion for others, can we really live excuse-free lives. And I agree with him 100%.

Thank you note

Thank you Dr. Wayne Dyer for the teachings in your book. I am blessed to have been your student and send you, wherever your soul may be right now, immense energies of love and gratitude for your timeless teachings which will live on and on forever. Thank you so much for having made your life purpose and passion, our growth and evolution into better human beings through your books and lectures. Thank you!

Heal Yourself; How to access your past and future self and be there for them during hard times

Dear reader and esteemed fan of everything spiritual, I am writing this post today, after the sweet aftermath of a gratitude meditation session with Manifest By Jess, a YouTube healer and my go-to gratitude champion. It has been forever since the last time I meditated, which explains why I have been so unfocused and unhappy. Meditation is a true gem which could save our lives if only people made it a priority first thing on their daily to-do lists.

If you are familiar with my journey here on this platform, you would know that I have had to grow up in the most unhealthy, chaotic surroundings without anything stable to ground my young and lost self on. Being here right now, writing this, is a testimony of the miraculous fact that I survived. I am strong and tough, yes, but that doesn’t mean I have no scars. These scars manifest themselves as chronic depression, which lasts months on end and severe anxiety and panic attacks. Given my suffering state of being, it is no wonder I desire healing more than anything else. Abundance therefore, for me means first and foremost, healing of all my wounds which I have suffered as a result of the hell I have been through, followed by freedom to enjoy life without restrictions and all the financial freedom the universe can give me in a single lifetime! I tried many times, to pray for true love, a job, and everything else I thought I needed to be happy and the universe delivered most if not all. While I was thankful of course, for my blessings, I realized that I was still hurting pretty badly, and that if I had healed first, I would have enjoyed everything else so much more. so how does anybody heal from past trauma? is someone going to come and help me heal? I don’t think anyone is coming.

Dale Carnegie, in his book, “How to Stop Worrying and Start Living”, told me a story of how he met a man who was looking for solutions to his life problems everywhere else, except in himself. Dale Carnegie then told him the truth we all fear and resent so much: Nobody is coming! Yes, that is true, there is nothing or no one out there who will show up to do the work you should be doing on yourself. And this was tough to hear because I had believed all my life, that God has prepared special angels in the form of helpful people who will reward those who have been suffering with everything they desire, as an incentive for surviving all the difficult times and refusing to give up hope. So, everyday, I would pray to God to hasten the arrival of my soul family, soulmate or that special someone, who would be the answer to my prayers and change my life for the better. You guessed right! This person never came. Why? because the person I was praying for, the one who would heal me and make everything right, was me all along. Let me explain…

If you are familiar with spirituality, you would know that one of the most important hail Marys of this universe, is the saying that time is an illusion. There is only now, this present moment. And if that is true it means, the child me is here right now, going through the worst time of her life, that heartbroken betrayed younger me is crying on that bed right now, that depressed me who cannot get out of bed to eat or wash up is suffering right this minute as I am writing this. This powerful truth is so life-changing. this means that with meditation and intention, you could send energies of healing, love and support to that version of you who is suffering alone. in fact, you could even send them guidance and advice, talk with them, and imagine yourself as if you were there, in that room with them, comforting them, and promising them that you would always be there for them. And the thing is, whether you want to believe it or not, YOU WERE always there for yourself! I know this may be hard to believe but trust me when I tell you, you can heal yourself from trauma, especially the type which does not listen to therapy or pills, by accessing your past self, and in some instances, your future self, through meditation and intention. Try it today! What do you have to lose?

Some affirmations you can use while meditating:

“I send energies of love and healing to my hurting self, in all directions of time and space, past, present and future.”

“My inner child, my younger self, I know you are hurting, please know I am here for you and I love you.”

“You are everything to me, my most important person, who I cherish very much more than anything else in the world, and I will always be there for you , no matter what. Therefore, don’t feel alone. You are never alone.”

“You are worthy and oh so valuable to me. I love you and care about you very much. Know that I am always there for you no matter what.”

These are just some affirmations I use for myself. Feel free to use more specific ones suitable for your situation and your trauma. All the best!

You Are Your Own Biggest Fan

I want to confess something. I have always wondered who my husband would be. I guessed and guessed my way throughout all the guys I have known, had a crush on, or simply met once or twice. Whenever I got too worked up on finding out who my spouse would be, I would write the names of all the guys I know, on tiny pieces of paper, fold them, and playfully ask anyone or anything that was listening, “Who will I marry, please, please tell me?” as I toss them into the air and close my eyes to pick one. Haha! Whether this works I am yet to find out.

There were other times I would consult with my tarot deck to find out things like, why I feel so insecure when it comes to relationships, why certain things keep on repeatedly happening to me, why I feel stuck in a certain way of thinking or doing things. When I am calm and focused, I find tarot to be so revealing, especially when I ask specific questions relating to myself. For example once I asked tarot where these feelings of insecurity and unworthiness come from? The five of pentacles showed up and next to it there was the 8 of cups which was then followed by the queen of wands. This is how I interpreted these cards to mean, I needed to walk away from feeling inadequate or lacking and embrace my personal power, because the queen of wands to me is all about self- empowerment, self-confidence and self-assertiveness, all qualities that the queen so proudly and fearlessly portrays. I took it to mean I needed to step away from feeling like a victim of circumstances of my life and instead wield my wand of personal power and let my fire burn bright as I assume the role of a powerful creator of my own reality.

How easy would life be if someone had a trusted source of guidance? How many pitfalls and mistakes would we avoid if we can connect to someone, or something, that has eternal wisdom and knowledge of all things, and is highly invested in making sure you have a great life experience? How magnificent would it be if we can know where to turn to whenever we feel overwhelmed, unsure of which decision to make, if we can trust this source of guidance with our life, because it has not failed us even once? And what would that source be? If not you? Who would invest in your best interests if not you? Who would want you to enjoy this life experience if not you? The answer has always been you. You are your own biggest supporter.

Before you look for guidance anywhere, look within yourself. You already know everything. You have already lived your life. You know who you will marry and you know who you will become. As Esther Hicks says,

Your higher self knows where you are in relation to what you want and it knows how to get you there using the path of least resistance.

Esther Hicks.

Imagine all your guidance methods and systems you have used before, to be your higher self. By your higher self I mean that unseen, pat of you that is wise and ever present, The part of you that whispers to you guiding you, giving you ideas, knowledge and inspiration. This is your true essence as a soul. This is your divine self.And the guidance you receive, is called divine guidance. Now we call this energy God, some call it spirit guides, others call it angels or guardian angels, but all these things emphasize the idea that something or someone separate has the power to change your life, whereas if you believe that your higher self knows where you are in relation to what you want and how to best get you there using the path of least resistance, then you will take responsibility for your life, and take back control which you gave to something else, someone else that is not you. If you believe that God exists within you, that the source energy that created the world is within you, so is the abundance and creative power that made everyone and everything, then your worries would end. You would be calm and reassured of the fact that you can get what you desire if you focus on what you want to attract into your life. And in the event that you find yourself stuck in unpleasant circumstances, you can be sure that you have the power to change them. Am I making sense?

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