Hi, it is me again. Your friend who cannot sleep on a day such as this unless she writes something.
Today was like any other day. I woke up, ate something as I reached for the remote to watch anything. Hours passed by and the day was gone before I could brush my teeth. I find myself dangerously bored during holiday season. If I cannot keep my brain and heart engaged in something, anything, I am afraid that could lead me back into Depression Town. I have been there and I do not want to go down there anymore. I have gone to great lengths to read self help books and listen to affirmations to waste all those precious Safaricom 4G bundles! Abraham Hicks says we need to decide how we want to feel everyday of our lives before we even begin the day. Sometimes I wonder if Abraham has been telling us all along to stop being so human all the time. I mean how do you decide to feel one emotion for the rest of the day when so many things can annoy you or make you feel so miserable about your life? You are supposed to feel happy no matter what, Abraham said, please say that again! I think it is not possible to be happy all the time. In fact, have you ever felt a little nervous whenever you become so elated and happy for fear that it will be followed by something sad? In our village, people say when you laugh too much it is a sign you will cry soon. Now with such fear-based thinking ingrained into our subconscious since before we were born, no wonder it is so hard to be happy and very easy to be worried and sad.
I try to think well of the guy who created life. The one who created everything and sent us here to exist and occupy space and live through time. While meditating, I found myself thanking him profusely from the bottom of my heart and my monologue went somewhat like this…
Thank you whoever you are who gave us life and brought us here to have this human experience. Thank you for the air we breath and for the food we eat. Thank you for waking me up to see the world in a way I could not dream possible. Thank you for my guidance system, for the signs, the numbers, the synchronicity and the messages. I would like to have everything in order to enjoy every moment, this moment right now. I want to be happy right here, right now. Because the present is all I have.
This monologue did not stop here but continued with requests of things that I believe will make me happy. As usual, we have been programmed to think that we need something to be happy. So you can understand, that even after reading several books proclaiming happiness is from within not without, I still find myself stuck with the belief that if I were to get a sudden windfall of money, or that loving and caring spouse or that beautiful home, then I will be happy and all my sadness will vanish into thin air. This belief persists, even after I have seen rich people with amazing homes struggling with finding happiness, and average people from ordinary backgrounds somehow, finding peace and satisfaction. So what is the secret to happiness? Does it lie in possessions? A caring loving spouse? A spacious beautiful home? Money? If you ask me I would say yes. I would be over the moon if I had all those things I mentioned. Can I be sure? That depends on how I will feel the first day I receive those amazing things into my life and the second day and how I manage to still feel happy and over the moon one year after receiving them and many more years to come after.You get my point? It is not the thing that is supposed to make us happy. It is happiness itself.
Here is the thing. If we can train ourselves to be happy all the time, in all our present moments without postponing our happiness until we get what we want, which I know even as I am here preaching to you guys, is awfully difficult to achieve, if it can be done, how easy would it be to enjoy when we finally do get what we want? The happiness would be doubled. Also, just in case we lose everything later,(gosh I am so pessimistic!) the world does not end for us because we can still be happy regardless. Therefore, my theory is this, the secret to happiness is to master the skill of being happy in the present moment and finding that one reason to smile and feel joy in the present no matter how small or insignificant the reason may be. It can be as tiny as that feeling of glee you get when you rub your cat’s soft belly( my cat has to have fainted in order for him to let me) , or enjoying the luxury of a full stomach. Anything really. Take your pick!