I never learn my lesson.
I fell for this guy in my class and what drew me to him was his voice. Yes he spoke with such a sexy voice I could not help but be smitten. It did not help that he was wonderfully eloquent and masterfully fluent in english. I melted under his every word and gaze. I coud not even look at him in the eye when he talked to me and I would tremble and my tongue would freeze. I managed to successfully embarass myself infront of him any times than I could count. I did not realize that I was falling for this guy. To me, I thought maybe I was grossly intimidated by his intelligence and that was why I would melt under his words and voice. Unbeknownst to me, the pitter patter of my heartbeat was a signal that cupid, one lazy afternoon had decided he should unleash an award-winning kind of dramatic love and he would so much delight in such a sight!
I died everytime I saw him or heard his name mentioned out loud. I needed to do something because the torture was so bad, it warranted the enactment of its own Act in the Kenya Laws Database.
I needed to tell him as much as I needed to breath- something which I forgot to do everytime I saw him at school. If I were my parents at the time, I would demand a fees refund from the school because technically speaking, I was not benefiting from any of the classes. How could someone affect me so much? I barely knew this person from outside the school walls. How can a partial acquientance have so much power over my mind, my thoughts, and my voluntary skeletal muscles movement? It just did not mae sense to me.
Gods of all crush-attacked heplessly-in-love girls, please rid me of this turmoil I am facing.
I went to the student hostels one evening, swearing that I would not sleep until the object of my affection knew my feelings for him. Snap! I wish there was a huge volcano right then that forced emergency evacuation to another planet and I would not have to see him again, because it would take a thousand years later to build Kenyatta University School of Law on Mars. Or that phone service all over the world went off because aliens invaded the Earth and in so doing disabled all our communications indefinitely. By sending that confession text I did something tremendously damaging to my self esteem and my poor heart that even World Wars could not hypothetically speaking, hurt me so. I was flat out rejected, and brutally so, so much that masters of unrequited love all over the world closed down their organisation: UnrequitedLove.org, for good! They did not think the pain inflicted on me was worth it! I became a warning to the entire world and to whoever thought of even coughing in the same room with their crush, to swallow that cough and push it down even at the risk of suffocating to death, because that was better than attracting the attention of their crush.
Never ever confess! Please for the sake of the continuity of human species on this Earth, do not tell a guy you like them, not for all the cheese burgers in the world!